How to Write a Meaningful Obituary

Step-by-step guide on writing a heartfelt tribute

Writing an obituary can feel overwhelming during a time of grief. But it’s also an opportunity — a way to honour a loved one’s life and share their story with friends, family, and the wider community. A meaningful obituary does more than just list dates; it captures the essence of a person and the impact they had on those around them.

Here’s a step-by-step guide to help you write a heartfelt tribute.

Step 1: Start with the basics

Begin with the full name of the deceased, their age, and the date and place of passing. You can also include their birth date and birthplace if you wish.

Example: “Margaret Anne Thompson, aged 83, passed away peacefully on March 20, 2025, in Hamilton, New Zealand.”

Step 2: Mention key life details

Include details such as:

• Where they grew up or lived
• Occupation or major achievements
• Military service (if applicable)
• Hobbies, passions, or causes they cared about

Don’t feel the need to list everything. Choose the details that really show who they were.

Step 3: Talk about family

List close family members, including:

• Spouse or partner
• Children and grandchildren
• Parents and siblings (especially if they’ve passed before)

Example: “She is survived by her husband Jim, her children Andrew and Susan, and five beloved grandchildren.”

Step 4: Share something personal

This is the heart of the obituary — a few sentences that show what made them special. Maybe they had a cheeky sense of humour, made the world’s best pavlova, or never missed a Sunday market.

Keep it honest, warm, and respectful. 

Step 5: Funeral and memorial details

Let people know about the upcoming service:

• Time, date, and location
• Whether it’s public or private
• Any special requests (e.g. donations instead of flowers, dress code)

Step 6: Closing message

You might want to end with a short quote, expression of gratitude, or simple goodbye.

“Forever loved and remembered.”

 Final Tips

• Write in a clear, warm tone — imagine talking to a friend.
• Proofread carefully — get someone else to check it too.
• Don’t rush. It’s okay to take your time.

A well-written obituary is a final gift — a way to honour someone’s memory and share their legacy with the world.